Angel?
OH! Okay, I got it. No, B, I wasn't saying
you were an angel. Phantom, yes. Wicked annoying and mysterious, yes. Angel looks a bit funny on you.
The angel project is another of my obsessions... see, I have this... comic I'm doing. Yes, yes, I know I can't draw, but I'm doing it anyway. The story basically is as follows: a group of "Supernals," or high-powered angels, were dispatched several thousand years ago to follow and keep under control, and possibly destroy, a group of "Grigori," or high-powered demons. They've been battling in a quiet way all this time, and now they're holed up in separate strongholds in Seattle, occasionally sparring. But the angels aren't your usual clad-in-light, edict-dispensing, Ten-Commandment-following God's-bitches you know from Sunday school. No no. A couple thousand years on earth has degraded them somewhat. Among the lineup:
Michael: Chief of the Angels in name if not in truth, wields a flaming sword, yes, and is said to deliver the proclamations of God... therefore spends a lot of time telling everyone what to do. Has an unfortunate taste for... um, baby meat. Is the reluctant angel of sleep, one of his most "irritating" (his word) duties being to sit and talk to insomniacs until they fall asleep. He has been known to knock them on the head with the pommel of his sword to speed up the process.
Metatron: Voice of God, once the Supernals' direct link to the Almighty. Has been so weakened by the stress of being a divine conduit that now he lives in a big tank, an emaciated, bewildered lump.
Saraqael: Angel of Repentance... can open up her cloak to display the complete sins of any who stand before her. Supposedly completely objective, but in truth tends to take advantage of her abilities, offering up tidbits of scandal for amusement at inopportune times and blackmailing people with the threat of revealing their vices.
Zagzagel: Angel of Wisdom, actually a matched pair of male and female angels who are known collectively. They speak as one, the thread of conversation switching from one to the other with no perceivable break. They are insatiably sexual, and the other Supernals have to force them apart to get them to pay attention to anything else at all.
Uriel: the Flame of God. He has hundreds of eyes scattered all over his body, and he can move them about his body at will, sending them to the ends of his fingers to look around corners and so forth.
Gabriel: Messenger of the Lord. Thousands of years of cynicism and "killing the messenger" have attenuated his shape so that he is a twisted little Gollum-like beast, who can be as fickle as a cat and turn on anyone with nasty claws and a snapping mouth like a chihuahua.
Raphael: Healer who pushes contraception on anyone who comes around, and has an irresistable impulse toward skinny-dipping in any available body of water.
Charoum: Protects the world from floods and storms. Was really,
really pissed off about that whole Noah's Flood thing. Moonlights as a TV weatherman.
There are more, and then all the Grigori, who are equally as colorful, but those are the highlights. So these Supernals fight the Grigori like some kind of "League of Extraordinary Gentlemen".... in theory. In practice, they don't do much of anything but play cards and eat pizza. Metatron, who provides them with instructions from God, hasn't spoken in five hundred years. Has God forgotten about them? Meanwhile the angels become decadent, more and more human, more and more like the Grigori they're trying to destroy.
Yeah, so that's the angel project. I'm working on portraits of all of the Supernals and Grigori right now... an uphill battle given my poor drawing skills, I can tell you. Maybe one of these days I'll find a scanner somewhere and show you all.